My Giant Midget

Once upon a time, not very long ago, a little midget stood in front of me and tried to block me from the view of some catcalling construction workers.

He was all of 1 meter in height, that little midget was, yet he glared at them with the fiercest look his eyes could muster, and I did feel protected.

"You are pretty, sis. They shouldn't look at you that way."

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Sometimes I miss my little midget. The one with the huge inquisitive eyes who would climb onto my lap and insist on doing my homework for me ( My teachers never did understand why I circled my multiple-choice-question answers weird).

The one who shared all his Action Men figures with me and made sure I learned how to fire every weapon. The one who ran into my room every so often while I was studying for PMR and SPM to "check that you weren't sleeping".

You see, these days my little midget has been replaced with a Huge Gruff Giant who towers above me at a whooping 1.82 meters and says things like

"You're really not a very pretty girl. Quite old and fat, actually."


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The -25'C Russian winter has finally brought me down. Miserable with a cough and running nose, I sms-ed home and received a call immediately.

Mum was all "just don't go anywhere, eat well and rest well." while The Giant grabbed the phone and demanded to know how I was.

" Hello"

" *cough* oh hey there"

" You sound weird. Have you been crying? "

" No I haven't. Just sick."

" What, you sure? You sound like you've been crying."

" It's my throat."

" You can tell me, you know."

" Of course I would, if I actually WERE sad, but I'm happy as a clam right now, what with the holidays just starting and all. "

"But you sound really down."

"I'm not. "

"Ok. Oh yeah sis sis did I tell you about ................................................."

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You know, I really don't mind being "quite old and fat" very much.